God and The Angel

Jaime Barash is a writer living on the shores of Lake Erie. She is currently working on her forthcoming book of Essays, Poetry, Mantras, and Musings, SODA POP WISHES & COFFEE STAINED DREAMS.

Anna stood at the gates of heaven where an Angel smoked a cigarette. “Scan your fingerprints” The Angel said. 

“But I’m dead, how can I have fingerprints?” 

“This is an auric scanner. It reveals every memory you have ever made in your life, even the ones you have tried to forget.” 

“Oh” said Anna, reluctantly placing her hand on the floating device. 

The scanner made beeping noises as it transferred the data to The Angel’s translucent palm. The Angel smoked. The Angel laughed, looking Anna up and down with judgment. 

Anna felt uncomfortable so she asked The Angel if she could bum a cigarette. They both smoked as the beeping went on. 

“Transfer Complete” The Angel said as she flashed the screen at Anna, revealing a green check mark. 

“I’ll be back” 

“Where are you going?” 

“To review all your memories with God.” 

The Angel slid the heavy iron gate across, disappearing behind a wall of roses that reached higher than Anna could imagine. The sky was the clearest blue she had ever seen and the clouds were puffy and white, illuminated by the sun. She went to reach for her sunglasses but remembered she was dead. It was so bright. 

Behind the gates of heaven God and The Angel were sprawled across a velvet couch filled with the feathers of white doves. They ate popcorn as scenes of Anna’s life played on the giant projector screen. God kept tally marks on a notepad in columns he titled GOOD and BAD. The Angel chain smoked beside him. 

When Anna’s life had finished flashing on the screen God ripped the piece of paper off and handed it to The Angel.

The Angel slid the gate across and returned to Anna. 

“God has reviewed your life” 

“And, what did he say?” 

The Angel lit another cigarette and pulled out the list from God. 

“God sees everything” 

“Uh-huh” said Anna, not knowing what that meant for her. 

“Anna, why did you fuck with God’s creation?” 

“What do you mean?” 

“Your lips, Anna.” 

Anna touched her lips but they didn’t feel like lips anymore, only air. “They were too thin.” 

“God makes no mistakes” The Angel told her, and Anna lowered her head because she had never thought about that, had never considered what God would think when she booked the appointment to alter God’s creation. 🫦

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