Private survivors

Terry Nguyen interviews Kylie Cheung, author of Survivor Injustice (August 2023).

Jezebel reporter (and NBA Twitter fan) Kylie Cheung’s latest book Survivor Injustice (North Atlantic Books, August 2023) investigates the adverse effects of domestic abuse and sexual violence on democracy “by restricting who can safely and autonomously vote and participate in public life.” The term “survivor,” in the wake of the #MeToo movement, has often been associated with the act of testifying, in both a legal and a public context.

Cheung’s research, however, focuses on the more private aspects of gender-based violence and survivorhood that is rarely emphasized in public discourse: voter suppression by a spouse, digital surveillance, and reproductive coercion as a result of dwindling abortion access. Violence enacted by the state and violence in the home are interlinked, Cheung argues. Earlier this month, I spoke to Cheung about how the “culture wars” have affected her political reporting, tonal shifts on social media post-MeToo, and the prevalence of trauma narratives in pop culture. Our conversation has been edited for clarity.

Terry Nguyen: Since the #MeToo movement, there seems to be a tonal shift in how people are engaging with feminist politics online. I sense a lot more cynicism. And every few months, there’s a conversation about how “#MeToo has gone too far.” How has that played out in your reporting?

Kylie Cheung: Living and writing about this stuff through the #MeToo era, there’s a general understanding in the culture that things have gotten a lot worse for abusers–they’re being held accountable—and things have gotten better for victims of sexual misconduct. This assumption neglects to consider how there are many forms of sexual violence. After Covid, there were many reports that stealthing (removing a condom during intercourse without the woman’s approval or awareness) and date rape drugs were on the rise.

I have noticed these tonal shifts on digital spaces. During the #MeToo movement, there was a lot of language around empowerment and support, whereas today, a slogan like “Believe Women” might come across as cringe. But it’s important to remember that regardless of how we talk about these issues online, sexual abuse and gender-based violence isn’t going away. I think there is a lot of skepticism around how we’ve previously placed the onus on survivors to do this kind of performative and also dangerous storytelling around what happened to them in a very public way. I also think people tend to look to high-profile cases, like the Johnny Depp and Amber Heard trial, as examples of how cases are legally playing out or the state of survivors when in reality, it’s just one example. It wasn’t the first time that a defamation suit was made against someone for speaking up about sexual violence.

TN: I’ve also been thinking about how our culture is fixated on trauma narratives, specifically in pop culture. New York Magazine recently came out with a profile of the author of The Body Keeps The Score, Bessel van der Kolk. There was a lot of skepticism towards van der Kolk’s theory of trauma, given its popularity. Do you feel like the culture is regressing in how we talk about these subjects, and even in regards to feminism?

KC: I haven’t read the profile, but I have heard about how van der Kolk has allegedly mistreated his employees. We’ve had this conversation before though. Last year, we were discussing the problem of how therapy-speak is everywhere. I thought about that recently in light of the Jonah Hill texts, where he misused the word “boundaries” to be very controlling towards his partner. I don’t think that the culture is regressing per se, but there seems to be more awareness of how certain techniques typically applied to survivors, like therapy-speak or processing one’s trauma, can be manipulated to keep people in abusive situations.

TN: A theme you return to in your book is that there are no saviors—only movements and solidarity. The impulse to appoint a savior or a sort of feminist figurehead seems very real, but the energy required to do so seems to have fizzled out. How has our reception of public, popular feminists changed?

KC: I feel like every person who’s been put on a pedestal has fallen short, whether that’s in electoral politics or even Hollywood. There’s a lot of dangers in tying these big movements or beliefs to specific individual people. I’m also thinking of someone like Lizzo, who was just sued by her backup dancers for creating an unsafe work environment. A feminist movement should be focused on demonstrating significant material progress for all women, especially those at the margins.

I’ve written before about tradwife influencers, which seems to be very much a reaction to the corporate girlboss feminism of the 2010s. Now, we recognize how hollow those corporate gestures of empowerment are under capitalism, and how mostly wealthy women are able to access those positions. But the answer is not to be a stay-at-home wife who’s financially dependent upon her husband. In my book, I write about instances where women’s economic situations are exploited to keep them in toxic relationships, which makes it harder to leave their partner. I don’t think there’s anything wrong or anti-feminist with mocking the girlboss or the tradwife; in many ways, I think memes showcase the absurdity of the paradox many women find themselves in.

TN: Your book also addresses the power that tech companies have over women’s data and privacy, while presenting a liberal front to their users. What did you learn that surprised you while reporting?

KC: Last year, I spoke to a woman who was part of a lawsuit against Lyft because she had this horrific experience where she was kidnapped and sexually assaulted by her Lyft driver. This was happening around the same time that Lyft was rolling out new safety measures and initiatives. I believe the company didn’t even initiate contact with the women who were harmed, and the plaintiffs didn’t receive any significant compensation. It’s interesting when you think of this push to frame Lyft as the more progressive, more ethical version of Uber. I also think of a company like Meta, which announced after Roe v. Wade was overturned that it would cover the costs of employee’s abortion, while having internal policies restricting conversations about abortion or reproductive health in the workplace.

TN: Recently, there have been a number of films and pieces of pop culture that have tried to encapsulate the experience of survivors, like Promising Young Woman, Luckiest Girl Alive, and even She Said. Most, however, seem to have fallen short by resorting to tropes. Are there any films, shows, or art you’ve seen that accurately represent these issues?

KC: Culturally, I do think we have to find ways to expand our storytelling, so that female characters are not simply reduced to the trauma or violence they’ve endured. At the same time, I think it generates important conversations about how we can depict very real situations that women go through while not using it as a plot device or relying on shock factors. I really enjoyed Kelly Bachman and Dylan Adler’s musical comedy show, “Rape Victims Are Horny Too,” which is truly funny and emphasizes how survivors can still be sexual beings, in spite of what they’ve endured.

Tuca and Bertie’s Lisa Hanawalt has also spoke about the decision-making behind an episode about Bertie’s past experience with sexual assault and the way the trauma of that still colors her life. It’s an adult cartoon about birds and it’s just so well done, how there’s no scene of the assault depicted, and Lisa Hanawalt says this is to ensure audience members aren’t judging whether it’s “traumatic” enough, and we have all the information we need—that Bertie experienced a violation that she’s continuing to live with. We see the same with I May Destroy You, which also meditates on the trauma of surviving sexual violence without depicting a scene of this, and really reflects on the multifaceted lives that survivors have beyond a lot of the one-dimensional renderings we see in media.

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